A Theme Time Radio Hour Christmas - Part the Deuce

It's that time of year again, boys and girls, where the Dreamtime team scour the interwebs for Theme Time Radio Hour and Our Host themed gifts, for you, our discerning audience. A few tongue-in-cheek selections and a few we wouldn't mind seeing under our own Christmas tree - Jailbait and Joyride take notice.

We present herewith our 2nd Annual Theme Time Radio Hour gift list (in no particular order)...

A Night at the Chelsea - Although Bob Dylan's room - #219 #211 - is currently undergoing hefty renovations, it's still Bob Dylan's room at the Chelsea, and you too can stay there after the work is complete. Visitors and residents of the Chelsea Hotel have included Eugene O’Neil, Thomas Wolfe and Arthur C. Clarke (who wrote 2001: A Space Odyssey while in residence. The Chelsea Web site charmingly misspells the title as Oddyssey). Allen Ginsberg, William Burroughs, Jasper Johns, Patti Smith, Arthur Miller, and many, many others have stayed there too. And among other deaths occurring at the Chelsea, both Nancy Spungen - who may have been murdered by Sid Vicious - and Dylan Thomas died there.

If you go, stay up all night, listen to the New York TTRH episode and re-write Sad-Eyed Lady of the Lowlands. Rates start at (around) the same figure as Mr. D's Room Number - $219.

***

A Photograph of the Brooks Atkinson Theater in New York City, During the Residency of the Twyla Tharp/Bob Dylan musical, The Times They Are A-Changin’. - Whatever you think of Sean Curnyn's quirky site, there is always something on RightWing Bob that will intrigue - and, quite possibly, infuriate - you. You have to give Curnyn props for going his own way, a 'tude I think Mr. D. would approve of.

Dreamtime supports quirkiness, even though we seldom agree with the opinions expressed in RightWing Bob, and we do like the photograph Sean is offering a lot. Get a piece of history, Bob Dylan's name appearing in lights on the Great White Way, and do some good by tossing a couple of ducats the way of RightWing Bob, too, 'cause the Bob Dylan Web would be a drabber place without it. $25 U.S. $30 International. Signed by the photographer.

***

XM Radio Stock Certificate - Dreamtime does not give stock advice, and if you could see our portfolio you'd know why, too - and given that SIRIUS XM radio's stock is currently ranging between 10 and fifteen cents a share, you'd probably be better off playin' the ponies than investing in the merged company. On the other hand, you could buy well over 500 shares of SIRIUS XM for what a collectible stock certificate from the original XM Satellite Radio will run you.

The better long-term investment? You decide. XM Radio original stock certificate currently on sale from scirpophily.com for $79.95.

***

iPod Phone/iPod Touch - A case can be made that satellite radio never has had a chance because of internet radio, which offers as many quirky listening choices as SIRIUS XM and is free to boot. If you can't beat `em, join `em, and joining `em may be the last best hope for SIRIUS XM.

Satellite radio's Obi-Wan Kenobi could be the promised - but still unseen - StarPlayr for iPhone application, which promises WiFi access to SIRIUS XM content available on the internet. What it will cost and exactly how it will work is still left to be seen, but watch this space.

Even if StarPlayr never sees the light of day, internet radio on an iPhone/iTouch will change your music listening life. It did mine. Currently available internet music apps in the iTunes store include Pandora, Last.fm, and AOL Radio... all free. Also worthwhile checking out at the iTunes store is the $5.99 Tuner Internet Radio App from Nullriver Software, providing access to thousands of internet radio stations and podcasts, including yours truly.

And, of course, you could always use your iPhone/iTouch to listen to those "illegal downloads" of Theme Time Radio Hour episodes Our Host mentioned during the Street Map show. Not that we know anything about that.

Apple iPod Touch starting at $219.00 at Amazon.

***

High Times Hard Times, by Anita O'Day - O'Day's gritty and absorbing autobiography - including abortions, jail terms, and drug addiction - has been recommended not once, not twice, but three times by Our Host over various TTRH episodes. If that doesn't send you out to get this book, I don't know what will. From $12.24 at Amazon.

***

Catch My Soul paraphernalia - Have a Jerry Lee Lewis fan in the house who has been very, very good? Reward them with The Killer's Private Stash - a bootleg CD containing "Lust of the Blood," and "Let a Soldier Drink" (From the TTRH Blood and War shows) which you can pick up at a pricey $79.99 at Amazon.

A little too rich for the blood? You could buy the more economical playbill for the London production of Catch My Soul, regularly available on eBay for prices beginning at $12.99. Jerry Lee Lewis is replaced by Lance LeGault, who would go on to portray Iago in the movie version, but hey, it's still Catch My Soul the musical.

Or, you could consider one of the movie posters for Catch My Soul, which don't have anything in common with the musical except Jack Good and the title. But the posters aren't bad-looking, and definitely would fit into a late-hippie decor, if that's your style. I particularly like the one with the copy... "It's A Total Immersion." Yeah, baby. From $14.99-$44.99.

***

Hank Williams: The Unreleased Recordings - Kinda a gimme, I know, but still a worthwhile recommendation. Before there was a Theme Time Radio Hour there was the Mother's Best radio show, and this 3-CD set captures Williams at the top of his form, plus conversation, introductions and commercial affiliation at its finest. The one box set you want to find under your tree this Christmas. $29.99 at Amazon.

***

Horseradish - Because Mr. D. breaking up as he struggles to say horseradish during the Blood show may be the single funniest moment of TTRH. From various vendors at various prices.

***

A Theme Time Christmas

There's just 48 days left of the holiday shopping season, and what to get that Theme Time Radio Hour fanatic in your household?

Dreamtime has come up with some, ahem, themed gift ideas for the most discerning fan tastes, and for anything from champagne to beer budgets. Anybody could think of the Baseball episode on CD, or gifting that special person with a subscription to XM Radio, but only at Dreamtime will you find these.

1. An iPod Retro Radio

A retro radio show deserves retro listeners, and what better way to show your head is in the past, no matter where your body may be, than with an iPod disguised as a vintage portable radio?

Go haunt a few flea markets or thrift shops, or maybe you'll find one squirreled away in the family closet. Bring your iPod along for sizing purposes until you find that perfect radio. Take the radio apart, gut it out, drop some foam in, route the cables.

Go show off.

Price: The cost of one vintage portable radio and your time and effort. Full instructions are here.




2. The Theme Time Radio Hour Poster


XM and/or bobdylan.com may eventually release a print edition of this Jaime Hernandez poster illustrating vignettes from the Big City, but if you don't want to wait, the 2 x 1 1/2'- foot 72 dpi image is available here.

Download the puppy, save it to some portable media like a CD or thumb drive and hie yourself off to your friendly neighborhood print shop. If you don't have one you already patronize, Kinkos (now owned by FedEx) is an option in most of the U.S. But any print shop willing to do a one-off poster will work.

Price: Kinkos in-store poster printing prices begin at $30. I used a heavy-duty poster stock that brought the price up to $55. Backing and framing will run you extra.




3. The Outlaw Blues Hat

Any TTRH wannabee-DJ is going to be looking good come Christmas morn wearing this hat inspired by the custom Outlaw Blues model Mr. D. sported on the 2004 Newsweek cover and during a 60 Minutes interview. And we have it direct from Tex Carbone that Our Host has worn it more than once in Studio B.

"As is the original, the 'Outlaw Blues" is made of specially dyed 'Silver Belly' 100% Fur Felt, with a lanky ''moonshiner' styled and shaped crown, and wide brim, which we then sidewindered on both sides in a 'West Texas' style fender fold..."

Price: $430 from Baron Hats.

4. A 6-Pack of Select Beer

If your gift recipient is like ol' Hank from the Drinking episode and likes a beer with a single throw switch, go empty out a cardboard 6-pack and refill it with a selection that could include Irish Red, Murphy's Stout, Newcastle Brown Ale, Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, Stella Artois, and Beck's. Or you could simply hop over to the Gift Specialists and order that Special Someone A Big Fat 6-Pack of California micro-brewed beer.

Price: From $20-$30 dollars




5. Suits Me: The Double Life of Billy Tipton

Our Host recommended this one back in the Tears episode. The perfect gift for that family reader - or relative with gender issues - on your gift list.

Billy Tipton was ajazz pianist who played in clubs throughout the Midwest for nearly 50 years. Upon Tipton's death it was discovered that the five-times-married father to three boys was biologically female. More info can be found at the author's site, which includes recordings of Tipton's music and voice.

Price: Paperback- $11.90 at Amazon.com.




6. Samson's Diner

If money is no object, Dreamtime has the perfect gift selection for you. Buy a diner and rename it Samson's. Imagine the look of delight on your hubby's (or hubbette's) face when they walk outside on a snowy Christmas morning and find this baby in the driveway!

So where do you find a diner for sale, you ask? No prob, answers Dreamtime. Just hop on over to the American Diner museum where you'll find listings for everything from the Sunrise Diner in Jim Thorpe, PA ($42,000) to the Gateway Diner (pictured above) in the Netherlands (105,000 Euros or B.O.) Learn how to make the world's strongest cup of coffee, and not only is this destined to be the best Christmas Gift Ever, but it will also become a revenue stream! Who could ask for more?

Price: From $6,000 to $113,00 or more depending on condition and location. Moving expenses and coffee extra.


7. People Take Warning! Murder Ballads & Disaster Songs 1913-1938


Know someone who has a yen to play Theme Time deejay, but who just can't seem to settle on a theme? Buy them this 3-CD box set, and they'll have a disastrous radio show nearly ready to go. Add some trivia on the Titanic and Johnstown Flood, a poetry reading of Lord Byron's The Destruction of Sennacherib, maybe an email from The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, stir well and voila! Instant Theme Time.

Price: CD Box set - $46.99. Selections as mp3 downloads - $0.99 ea. From Amazon.

8. 2008 Hybrid Cadillac Escalade

Because we can't say it any better, here's the blurb from Automobile Magazine:

"Attention hip-hop stars, professional athletes, and fat-wallet extroverts of all stripes: The new Cadillac Escalade is here. And to go along with your diamond-studded earth shoes, the Cadillac Escalade will go hybrid in the 2008 model year, along with the Chevrolet Tahoe and GMC Yukon. GM claims a 25 percent increase in fuel economy."

Estimated Price: $54,875 - $57,430


9. Figgy (or Figi) Pudding

However you want to spell it, it spells Christmas according to Our Host! But who has the time to make one from scratch like Bob? Dreamtime stepped into the breach and found a pre-made Figi for the well-meaning but time-challenged.

According to the description at the appropriately named figis.com, it's "spice-laden, loaded with raisins, and deliciously drenched in brandy. It's so good that wassailers made a song of it… and, though this pudding has no figs in it, it lives up to the tribute! Add the included Brandy Butter Hard Sauce for ultimate Figi goodness. Avail. Oct. 15th thru April."

Price: 2 lb. Figi Pudding $29.99

.